- Superman character design reboot — everything’s exactly the same, only Superman now has small orange-feathered wings growing out of his neck. Clark Kent wears a permanent neck brace.
- Stunning new issue reveals Batman won’t eat broccoli.
- Special Aquaman appearance in Little Mermaid reboot in which Aquaman murders Scuttle.
- Martian Manhunter releases dope mixtape (under his alias J’onn J’onzz); Pitchfork gives it a 6.2.
- Wonder Woman sends back her sarapatel — “Sorry, just doesn’t taste authentic.”
- Flash is the subject of a shortlived 1990s TV show remembered fondly by exactly no one. Danny Elfman composes the score.
- Green Lantern stalks former high school girlfriend on Facebook; spends hours watching locomotive trains on YouTube; argues frequently with neighbors; has occasional thoughts about suicide.
Biblioklept 
http://www.juxtapoz.com/current/greg-guillemins-the-secret-life-of-superheroes
LikeLike
I am so mad about that Pitchfork for that J’onn J’onnzz review. He releases his first mixtape right as the whole style that they pushed so hard for reaches more popular levels, so other people started liking him and writing about him before Pitchfork did, so they can’t even let themselves admit just how damned good it is.
LikeLike
Hey, maybe I should review my comments before I post them… Proofreading! It is important.
LikeLike